Weather vs. Family and Friends

Forgive my not writing in my blog all weekend. This was a hard weekend for me and I am not sure why.

I woke up Saturday morning so filled with loneliness and sadness of being alone here. I am not sure where it came from but it was so strong it was like a presence beside me constantly.

I avoid people when I am like that as I don't want to spread my poison around. I also personally can not stand the sound of my whining or misery, so I prefer to just ride it out.

When my grandmother asked what was wrong I told her I was sad at being alone and that I missed my husband terribly. She explained in her version of thinking that I should not be sad as I was here in Paradise and it was cold and snowy in Canada. Funny that may be here version of life and it certainly was my father's but it is not mine.

I never could understand how climate was a priority of your family and friends and I used to get very upset at my father for that reason.

I get the amazing comfort of being in a temperate climate all the time. I get the no snow and no ice and no cold. I get the flowers and the trees and the views.

It is beautiful here but nothing for me could replace my family. I know it will be easier when my immediate family is together and we make new friends.

But I know that I will be happier when money is not an object and I can visit my son, my family and the friends that are so precious to me.

I truly wonder if I will ever fully adapt.